So, here we are, 15 episodes in and the writers finally penned an episode about McNamara/Troy’s bad boy. This ought to be good. Hmmm, I think I’m going to call this episode…

Christian Troy

Boy, that was easy. If there’s one thing we’ve learned about Dr. Troy it’s that he’s a man who doesn’t mince words. And while this can be refreshing (sometimes) in real life and entertaining (sometimes) on reality based TV, his abusive words would NEVER be tolerated in the workplace, regardless of how good (looking) he is. In fact, if someone acted in real life the way Julian McMahon acts the part – especially the way he often talks to and treats his colleagues… well, let’s just say he or she would have a lawsuit on his or her hands in a Miami medical minute. With that said, thank goodness for Dr. Sean McNamara.

Sean’s soft-spoken, well-mannered, well meaning… definitely the better half of McNamara/Troy (probably, why he hasn’t had an episode named after him yet)… can you say, BORING? Sean’s wife can. Anyway, he’s a real professional… except when he refuses to admit that he still suffers with the yips (shakes), almost killing a patient during surgery to remove a “hematoma from hell” from the man’s neck. Hey, how could he know something might go wrong? I mean, a scalpel, a golf-ball sized collection of clotted blood, veins, arteries and the shakes… what’s the problem? No problem. If something happens – and of course it does, because it’s TV – just blame the patient’s brush with the big sleep and a prolonged recovery on the anesthesiologist. I mean, that’s what they’re for, right? No biggie. But, enough about Dr. McNamara; this is Dr. Troy’s time to shine… besides, it’s not like Sean is his only partner.

Dr. Troy’s had lots of partners… and just because they’re not in business with him doesn’t mean they’re not professionals. Although on this particular evening, he obviously got down to business with an amateur, seeing as he had to coach her through performing oral sex. Anyway, before he even had time to officially score her “bedroom acrobatics,” she accidentally broke his “perfect” nose. Again, no problem, his business partner and best friend is a plastic surgeon. Of course, would you trust someone with the shakes to perform your rhinoplasty? Dr. Troy doesn’t… so, it’s off to see Dr. Monica Jordan.

Things are going great at Dr. Jordan’s: Christian steals one of her patients, a man with a supernumerary nipple… or “nubbin” for you fans of “Friends’,” Chandler Bing. Things are going so well, in fact, that Christian decides they should have sex… with Dr. Jordan, not the dude with the third nipple. So, he gets naked. Then, Dr. Jordan gives him a taste of his own medicine, telling him that he would really benefit from liposuction to remove those “love handles” and Restylane® to “soften the puppet lines around your mouth.” Screwed again… just not in the good way. Well, there’s only one thing left to do… perform the rhinoplasty himself. You ever try to cut your own hair? Yeah…

By the way, 14 blogs behind me, and I can’t remember if I ever confirmed that, yes, most plastic surgeons do fire up the stereo during a procedure; the ritual actually helps the doctor to relax and focus on his work, all while tapping into his artistic abilities. Plastic surgery is, after all, an art form. So, the next time nip/tuck shows a CD being put in before videos of rhinoplasty or liposuction videos, there’s some truth there. Here? Well, it’s just Dr. Troy in his Gucci briefs standing in front of a mirror to perform nose surgery on himself. Needless to say, his DIY rhinoplasty didn’t quite go as he had hoped. In fact, rather than the “perfect nose,” he gave himself a really, really bloody one.

In the end, Christian asks his friend and fellow plastic surgeon, Dr. McNamara, to perform his revision rhinoplasty (nose surgery to correct a botched nose job). And, in the hopes of helping his friend regain his confidence, Christian opts for no anesthesia… I’m sure the co-workers he’s demeaned on a daily basis didn’t have a problem with his request.

Oh well, not exactly the episode I looked forward to with such great anticipation, but not bad… just inaccurate. That’s Hollywood, and that’s all folks!

See you next time.

Charlie Sheridan

Medical Editor and Consultant